Random thoughts.

March 10, 2008

The cramps (see previous post) turned out to be appendicitis. I wanted to use my strength in making this entry because my sister said something about my ‘Cramps post’ and I found it funny. I had to be rushed to the hospital a few minutes after I made that post. Haha, appendectomy isn’t really as easy to undergo as they may say. I had to be in the operating room for four hours for some reason I don’t really want to know. That’s awkward because the surgeon had told us that the operation would only last for about 30 minutes or an hour. And it’s just appendicitis for heaven’s sake. I wasn’t even eating properly for a week after the operation because I have a reeeally good health to begin with. I was only able to eat normally yesterday. I don’t know if I already regained much strength to go to school. I can’t even go out of our room without feeling dizzy…

I had a check-up this morning and I was given a new prescription… of vitamins. Goodness, I would have vomited right in front of the doctor is she told me to continue taking those Amoxiclav tablets.

Adeth called me to check on what’s happening to my world and to tell some of what happened to our school during my absence. I wouldn’t tell them of course. Adeth was being too kind to call me and send me messages. She kept on updating me with anything and everything. I wasn’t able to reply to some of my classmates because I couldn’t manage to send messages to all of them without getting exhausted. Some of my friends weren’t able to talk to me because I… don’t know. It was weird and, yes, sad but maybe we just couldn’t find a way to contact each other. Or maybe it’s just me.

Elaine has been sending me messages but not that often. I’m really, really sorry for leaving you with all the Peer work!! I’ll try to check on them when I come back!! (^^”)

I talked to Jamie a while ago. It was a rather short conversation but it was pleasing to hear something from her.

My classmates.. I haven’t heard from most of them for a while! Very few sent me messages but I still want to see them. I miss my weird conversations with my seatmates. Janine, wa, I wasn’t able to go to the SOSE Open House!! Wala akong maikukwento sa’yo!! You better tell me what happened in Benilde when I come back!!

About my other friends, well, I do not know, but Jamie told me that “nag-aalala rin naman sila”. It’s not like they bothered to send a single message. Jamie, I understand because she doesn’t have her phone, but the others… Anyway, who cares about it? They probably wouldn’t bother to send one unless I die or something near that.

I don’t want to talk about this appendecitis issue because it just brings the hospital-memories. It’s definitely educational but not entertaining. Ee… shivers.

You know what, I’m typing this in a dark room. Dark. Dark as in I’m using my brother’s flashlight now just to see the keyboard. I have no idea about what happened to the light but this feels stupid. I lost my stylus somewhere and I couldn’t find it. I don’t know if I left it in the bedroom or dropped it here, on the bathroom floor, or worse, outside. Waa… I don’t even use it!! Maybe I’m too fond of using my fingers as the stylus that I’ve forgotten to put it back to it’s place. Sana sa taas ko na lang nahulog!

I bought two books yesterday. I wanted to read Memoirs of a Geisha since I’ve watched the movie and it was only yesterday that I started reading it properly. Reading the e-book version doesn’t suit my eyes. Brr…

I almost forgot about the book that someone had told me about, but my sister luckily knew it and I only needed to say one of the words in the title. Tuesdays wuth Morrie. Hooray.

You might notice that I talk or rather, type differently in this post. I’ve been too affected by reading Memoirs that I talk like Chiyo/Sayuri now. Oh no, I should stop.

I realized during my stay in the hospital and after that I should just follow wherever God may lead me and just put upon my shoulders nothing but my faith and His guidance. I’m pretty confused and I’ve consumed mostly problems during my entire life, but the fact that I’m still alive makes me wonder why I am and if I really should be. I don’t know what path I’m supposed to take but, rest assured, I’ll be safe if I just trust Him.

I’m thankful for the nice people around me, and also for the annoying ones who keep my blood rushing and make my life more miserable and less boring. Though I’m not good at handling this kind of people, I’m sure that I can just go on through my life and let them be because nothing good will really happen if I rant all day about them. I could always think that I myself could be or is better, but of course, so could they. I wouldn’t pretend not to care or not to be bothered, but as long as I keep myself composed and ready, I’ll be able to go through with them. I would be able to tell them indirectly, “Hey, you know what? I’m happy. All because you tried to ruin my life.” I’m not promising to remain being such a nice person because, first of all, I’m not and no one really is. Go on and do what you like. It’s not like I handle the world to stop you, but you might as well consider that you also do not handle it or anything at all to come and try to crash my life. I’m not pertaining to someone but I would like to say this to anyone who might try or might HAVE tried to do it. Friend or stranger, I hope you learned a little more about me.

I’m done! I’m off to eat and sleep.

Bye.