hUmoR0us WrITing GuideLinEs.

August 16, 2007

I hate sTiCKy CaPs.

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Humorous Writing Guidelines

1. Be more or less specific.

2. Use not bad grammars.

3. Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

4. Don't use no double negatives.

5. Avoid tumbling off the cliff of triteness into the dark abyss of overused metaphors.

6. Take care that your verb and your subject is in agreement.

7. No sentence fragments.

8. Placing a comma between subject and predicate, is not correct.

9. Who needs rhetorical questions?

10. Use the apostrophe in it's proper place.

11. Avoid colloquial stuff, like totally.

12. Avoid those run-on sentences you know the ones they stop and then start again they should be separated with semicolons.

13. The passive voice should be used infrequently.

14. And avoid starting sentences with a conjunction.

15. Excessive use of exclamation points can be disastrous!!!!

16. Exaggeration is a million times worse than understatement.

17. Stamp out and eliminate redundancy because, if you reread your work, you will find on rereading that a great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing, so reread your work and improve it by editing out the repetition you noticed during the rereading.

18. It's incumbent on one to employ the vernacular and eschew archaisms.

19. It's not O.K. to use ampersands & abbreviations.

20. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are usually (but not always) an obstacle for readers (and make it harder on readers even if you're being careful).

(author unkown)

 

source: How to Construct an Essay

 

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Pe0plE sh0uLD st0p wr!TinG lyk diS.

Ye$, $t0p !t. n0w. 

Wala na namang pasok.

Kaya wala kaming test sa Physics.

 

Wahoo?

NO.

Mabubuhol ang schedule ng Honesty. Retreat na namin next week!

 

Anyway, RETREAT LETTER KO, HA!? 

Walang pasok!!

August 8, 2007

HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Papercut

August 2, 2007

Wa, I have a papercut. It stiiiiings!

 

I saw Ate Jamie a while ago. No, I mean, she saw me.

 

I'm drinking Gatorade now, and I'm eating mango jelly.

 

I want more Cheesy Pops.

 

I'm sleepy.

 

Toink. 

IDOL… what?

August 1, 2007

The whole high school community of ICAM went to SM San Lazaro for the movie screening of "IDOL Pag-asa ng Bayan". The movie was great, though it was a bit disturbing. Anyway, I have no intention of doing a movie review here. I don't want to spoil you guys and get sued by SM Cinemas for lack of viewers. I'll just talk about what happened to the ICAMites during and after the film viewing.

We were supposed to buy our food in SM. NO ONE was allowed to bring in foods that came from ICAM or wherever outside the mall. As proof of what I said, Sr. Flor confiscated Adeth's Nestea Ice. Then you might want to go to ICAM and look at the side of the gate where you'll see rows of confiscated Nestea bottles.

Anyway, since we can't take our eyes off the big screen, we didn't even bother buy ourselves some fancy food from SM Cinema's fancy popcorn store. Some students went out while the film was still running. When they came back, the movie was almost finished. Galli also bought a bag of popcorn. I have no choice but to beg her for food. Shoot, I was so hungry. Luckily, Galli was so kind that she handed me some and let me indulge the cheesy popcorn. She also gave me candy!

After the movie, Ms. Tina (one of the producers of the film, not our guidance counselor), told us to ask our questions about the IDOL. And so the saga begins.

The students asked questions.

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Student #1: "Nag-re-take po ba sila ng Physics exam?"

(Me: "Duh!? Naka-graduate nga sila e. Malamang nag-re-take sila.")

—

Student #2: "Inamin po ba ni Elly na nandaya siya?"

(Me: "Banamanyan! Naka-graduate nga siya! E kung inamin niya, sana hindi ganyan yung ending!)

—

Student #3: "Ano pong ibig sabihin nung paglipad ng pera?"

Malabuyo: *explains thoroughly*

(Me: Hay sa wakas, may sumagot din ng maayos!Go Malabuyo, go!!)

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Student #4: * Nagtagalog. Wala man lang "po" * 

Mga 4th year sa taas niya (kasama ako): "Oy! Mag-"PO" ka naman!!)

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I can't remember the other questions. It's "SO VERY" obvious that they were not paying attention to the movie. Or maybe they just lack common sense. To think that they're studying in a private school.

 

What I learned in IDOL; Ang mga kakatuwang lines ng mga estudyante:

–> The term  "SO VERY"

–> "I did not cheated!"

–> Student: "Matalino ako!"

    Teacher: "Explain Einstein's Theory of Relativity!"

    Student: "NYE!"

–> "What-ever!" (with raised three fingers on both hands)

–> "Close kami e." (raises separate fingers)

–> "I promise." (crosses fingers)

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Listening to: Dearly Beloved -Reprise-

Eating: nothing.

Drinking: water.

Recently: burped.